March 11, 2013

• so sam lin won the lindsey stirling cover contest, honestly I thought he did a great job and he deserves it. he'll definitely have music in his life forever, he is so set and shouldnt care about school, not one more qtr dude. I'm really proud of him, but he's definitely too cool and awesome and BUSY AS FUCK for me now.
  sighh all i ask is all the time in the world, so lets forget about this sam guy because he got too much going for him now
  i feel like just another fan girl now so much for that

  so luis finally gave me MY birthday present a month later
  i might go back to him isnt that pathetic of me? i dont know i have to think about it and get my shit together because i still have school and I have to recompose and redo my steps and life because things got a little derailed on friday after i found out i did not get HA. everyone thought I would, i thought i would but i knew that my interview went not well and i was counting on how much they knew about me already and what I have done, but that was too dependent on not the interview the ultimate deciding factor. I cried all Friday afternoon because of this derailing, it was all i ever wanted in college i felt like i worked so hard up to this moment to be slapped to the ground. for nothing, all this for nothing, but you know what i did it cause i loved it, i loved it. and I just have to step forward from there, i want to famous, and then i look at what sam is doing and it's just too much work and too large of a scale for me for me to devote the amount of time i'm willing to.

  but i want to sing. I've always wanted to be HA and i didn't get that so i want to attempt to learn to sing.
  aside from that i had another pathway in case i didn't get HA i'm going to graduate early because i have nothing left to do here except get a fucking internship
  just one good internship in an agency
  i REALLY need to do this ASAP.
  fuckkkkkkkkk

  k well anyways i want to sing and I have to seek out an sd voice teacher because the next big thing i'm going to work on aside from internship is go to cruiseline. that's what i want to do once i get our of university because that's the only time i can. and now i can do it sooner. i really want to go agva though!!!! im short, but if i can just master my voice, my voice and singing, that would be beautiful achieve something i've always wanted then i can head out to new york for auditions. fuck how terrifying! ok yes that's what i want but i still want to sing

  my girl crush sings, she's so beautiful and talented..
  anyways i dont want to move to new york i want to stay in la cause it's too complicated in new york, but i have to go there if i want to be an agva on cruiseline SIGHH i have a year
  i need to look into that but most importantly internship

  and finals in two weeks, which i REALLY need to read for the rest of my days
  READ READ READ and catch up and then....

  tomorrow i have things to do i really do.
  forget about suing for now,
  i guess stop by writing center tomorrow.........

  goals for tomorrow:
  send e-mail to EAP counselors for gilman, pat da for HA
  read at least two readings....
  study for mgt106 final on tuesday

  i thought i had time and then i realized that i have internship tomorrow.
  this internship is my alternative, i was half assing it because i really thought i wasnt going to continue onto next yr because i was going to be an HA but nvm. art power has the most talented art nuts
  my own supervisor is an acrobat acting comedian and has been on america's got talent and had his own show down in sd for a while. he just came to ucsd so that he could get a degree b/c much of what he wants to do requires a college degree. hes so cool, and now i realize why hes such a jerk.

  im meeting so many amazing new people.

  i need to be amazing too, i can be now move forward and commit to be something amazing.

  and get amazing grades
  and go to the gym.

  Good night.

  HAHAHA NO MORE 6TH FLOOR BITCHES

  • 3:32 am
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