January 9, 2012

• dear xanga
  i feel like ive failed already
  failed already with everything new years
  im not ready for school
  not ready for the new year
  not ready to start being a new me
  though i did go to a disney audition on saturday which was GREAT
  but from after john came and visited me i felt it was all down hill
  and i wasted my time
  and i dont know it was just bad

  i need to stop with luis
  i always have shitful regret after seeing him
  and especially after spending the whole day with him
  ALWAYS
  i need to stop and be more
  be more stronger
  please
  please

  im a horrible person.
  I need to make it stop and no one else
  but i feel a wreck and am a wreck?
  i need to make it stop.
  ill call david start texting him start working on our shit
  i want to compete
  no what im doing and what i did was wrong
  i realize that my mom is concerned with me
  i realize that
  i realize that
  now its only to stop it

  stop
  lets get this show on the road
  because my show must go on
  and rock
  but today was a nice day.

  • 4:17 am
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